Sarah James Interview - Part Two

Thanks for coming back. I hope you have all enjoyed the interview so far and the final part is now available to read. Don't stop now!

4. What inspired you to write Midwife Wisdom, Mother Love? What did you want to achieve by telling others about your experiences?

As I said at the start, the birth of my first child, Jack, and the shock of that birth, was a big inspiration. The antenatal classes I taught were also an inspiration. I was amazed at how many women in their early to mid thirties had never even held a baby let alone attended a birth. There was a lack in the knowledge that used to be handed down through the generations. Women are no longer at home helping their cousins or sisters look after babies. Women are at work. Most of the time they don’t give babies or birth a second thought until they decide they want a baby of their own, and then all of a sudden they find themselves faced with a seemingly insurmountable learning curve.

I wanted to help women on that journey, in a friendly down to earth way that wasn’t going to overwhelm them or make them feel like they were being talked down to or dictated to. I wanted women to know the truth about birth, the things that have made me laugh, the things that have made me cry. Most of all though, I wanted to empower women, wanted them to be confident in their bodies and in their heart so they could choose the birth that was right for them and their babies.

5. You mentioned about two other projects, including another non fiction book that you are currently working on. Please tell me more about these.

The non-fiction book I’m working on is a parenting book; it’s been a long time in the making.

Originally I thought it was going to be a book about breastfeeding and sleep patterns, about babies, but I’ve come to realise, as my babies have grown, that there really is no right or wrong way to bring up a baby as long as you are bringing them up with love. And besides that there are oodles of books out there telling you how to do it, something for everyone to identify with.

So with Jack turning eighteen this week – I can’t believe I’m the mother of an eighteen year old (how did that happen?), my parenting book has morphed. It’s become more of a philosophy on parenting than a ‘how to’ although there are definitely ‘how to’ bits in there. It’s a big unwieldy thing at the moment with eight sections all headed with attributes that you would hope your child grows up to have like, independent, creative and considerate and then underneath the headings a theory on how you might gently nudge your child in the right direction. I think I had to wait until Jack was eighteen before I could write this one, had to prove I was capable of surviving the parenting journey.

The other book I’m working on is a fiction book called Luka. When I had my babies I was desperate for a girl, I know, you shouldn’t be, but I was. I’d grown up with two sisters and a mother who I was very close to, I guess I was looking to repeat those relationships. Don’t get me wrong, I love my boys desperately and wouldn’t swap them for all the girls in the world, but there was just something in me, something I couldn’t deny or squash, that wanted a daughter. It turns out I’m not the only one out there, it’s amazing when you talk to women who only have boys, how many of them had been secretly wishing for a girl. So all this got me thinking. What if a boy knew that his mother had been desperately wishing for a girl? Where would that leave that kid? What would his relationship be like with his mother?

Luka is about a fourteen-year-old boy who struggles with all these questions, particularly the one of whether his mother loves his sister more than him. I’m on the final edit of this book, hoping to have it out by the end of the year.

I want to start by saying a big thanks to Sarah for taking the time to answer my questions and I wish her the very best of luck with Midwife Wisdom, Mother Love, as well as other projects.

For more details, visit - http://www.sarahjames.com.au/ or if you would like to purchase a copy of this book, it can be done via the following link - http://tinyurl.com/3rj365e.

Sarah James Interview - Part One

I was recently given the opportunity to interview Sarah James about her book - Midwife Wisdom, Mother Love. Keep on reading to find out more about this interesting guide for both mums and dads to be.

1. Your book Midwife Wisdom, Mother Love is an excellent guide to help prepare mothers and fathers-to-be for the process of pregnancy and childbirth. Please tell me more about it. What can readers expect to learn?

When I fell pregnant with my first son, Jack, I was already a qualified midwife who’d delivered hundreds of babies. I thought I knew everything there was to know about pregnancy and birth, then I had Jack. Birth and labour were a shock, I couldn’t believe how different it was to what I’d expected it to be.

Lying there in the birth suite with Jack in my arms I remember distinctly thinking that if I was this unprepared, how would a woman who wasn’t a midwife, a woman who knew nothing about birth cope? That was when the idea for Midwife Wisdom, Mother Love was born (excuse the pun). I wanted to write a book that was open and honest, that told the real story of birth, no glossing over, no hidden agendas, just the simple truth told from the heart.

Midwife Wisdom, Mother Love is a combination of both my personal and professional experience covering topics such as anatomy and physiology, ‘the ouch factor’ – how labour will really feel, and it includes my four birth stories which range from just short of a caesarean section to a homebirth.

Women who have read the book have told me that it’s like sitting down with a midwife who’s your best friend and having a heart to heart chat over a cup of coffee. What I hope my readers get from Midwife Wisdom, Mother Love is empowerment and a belief in their own heart, ‘Pregnancy and birth is about your heart, about how you feel inside. Be true to yourself. Listen to everyone’s story but most of all listen to your heart.'

2. If you could provide any mother and father-to-be with a few key pointers, what would they be?

Do antenatal classes, for the insight, but also so your support person feels comfortable and confident. You’re going to need them to be.

Interview as many people as you have to find the right person to look after you during your pregnancy and birth. Take a list of questions and ask all of them, don’t compromise, the right person will be out there, sometimes you have to be patient though.

Think of giving birth as the same as making love, it’s that intimate. Then, when you have that picture in your head, decide who you want at the birth. The one biggest factor influencing your birth is your ability to relax so you need to be extremely comfortable with whoever you decide to have at the birth.

Have a birth plan but make sure it’s flexible. Don’t write it down, instead envisage it as on going conversation between you, your partner and your midwife (or doctor).
Enjoy as much of your pregnancy and your birth as you can, you never know, this could be the last time you do it.

Remember, women’s bodies are made for giving birth; you have waited (even if you don’t know it) your whole life to do this, embrace it and be in awe at your ability to open and welcome a new life.

3. As a mother of four, is Midwife Wisdom, Mother Love based on personal or professional experience? Or a combination of both?

A combination of both my personal and professional experience. My own four birth stories are in the book, they show you from a very personal angle what birth is like and also help to illustrate how one woman can experience birth in so many different ways.